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10:40 p.m. - 2004-02-10
they put a bird's foot in my backpack!
okay, so lunch started out okay. i was eating my salad, and we were talking about bodily functions again-or was it prom?-i don't really remember, it was something that we always are talking about. then, adelaine spotted a dead bird, about 20 feet from our, of course, after complaining about dead birds following her, she gets up to go poke at it. eventually, all the girls are hopping off the stoop and bending over to examine the ill-fated pigeon. i, being disgusted by, and mildly scared of, dead things, ignored them and enjoyed my salad. until i saw them trying to pick part of it up. not only were they trying to pick part of it up (with sticks), but they were trying to get it over to the stoop. when i saw this, i fleed (word?).

long story short-the flucking pigeon's foot was smuggled into my backpack. after returning to the stoop, to eat my pineapples, i noticed the poorly concealed smiles and not very subtle eyes. i flipped out, but let them assure me the foot was gone....wait, this is not the abridged version-soory...well, i ended up spitting out pineapples then pouring them all onto the ground and by the end of lunch, there was dirt in my underwear, a foot in my backpack, and tears on my face. all in all, i'd have to say lunch was a disaster and i only had 2 pinapple chunks. pssshh...friends: who needs 'em?

after school i went to take a gander at the corpse and found nothing but feathers. no blood, no brains, just grey and white feathers. but i could still feel the pineapple chunks eager to work their way up my food tube, so i scurried away.

is that how you spell grey? is that the canadian way? is there a canadian way? does anyone else say canadia by mistake?


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