7:58 a.m. - 2004-04-26
i dont know what it will take to release me ennui's smothering hold. apparently, not a night out with mohawk, angelo, coke, and other random drugs. not a weekend of work. not skipping school to get fucked up with shanon. i dont know. i think that i dont even let these things penetrate my being. once they happen i forget about them. i need to feel more of a thrill when i am doing stuff so i will remember it and be satisfied by it.
somebody save me. take me away. i keep telling myself: less than 4 months. if i have the money to get there.