3:24 p.m. - July 20, 2005
well, in the eight days since that was written, ive changed my mind.
i dont need him and i feel bad for so desperatly expressing to him the opposite. i dont want him to feel obliged to hang out with me. im not a pity friend. which, im afraid, is what ive been conveying to him: that i am.
i dont need anyone. i think that i need him least of all. he has to go and live his life, and as much as i want to control it/be a part of it/know every detail of it, i cant.
i get it. im done. im alone and content to be so.