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8:12 a.m. - July 22, 2005
these walls
theyre closing in on me
fast as ever now
but i cant pay attention to that
because Emptiness is crawling up an arm
and Bitterness is scurrying down
i feel their faint tickle
and jump to brush them away
but im too late
it burns when they descend into my flesh
looks like theyre here to stay
i have to escape this box im in
before the Hopeless eats me whole
but when i go and open the door
the Outside starts to suck out my soul
i slam the door and hide under the bed
hoping the Fear is just inside my head
almost to the point where id rather be dead
i feel a drop rolling down my leg
its the trickle of Doubt
oh god-make this stop
i plead and i beg
but theres no one here to hear
this sheer pitch of fear
my vision is suddenly unclear
ive gone blind to all Reason
im dying now
i know it
once i accept it i can finally overthrow it
one by one
they all disappear
the Emptiness
the Bitterness
the Hopeless
the Doubt and the Fear
the walls back away
as the door opens wide
i crawl out from under the bed
with relief and some pride
only to find
that no life does wait
because i just died


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