7:51 a.m. - Wednesday, May. 09, 2007
of course i said yes. i mean, i also told him that that could be a long way away and we have no clue as to whats going to happen between now and then and not to get his hopes up cuz i fuck shit up. but, i still said yes.
i also talked to my mom about moving plans for june. shes not going to move. just me. so, im thinking-maybe i can help him get that furnished studio one block up from me and stay with him. that way, rent will be $100 less than what it is now and i can keep my job instead of finding a new one of those too. it also means, i may actually be able to keep him around longer than a month. i havent asked him if i could (temporarily, duh!) live with him, but im already trying to think of where i could keep all my stuff. we looked at the apartment last week i think. its nice. and i want it. i gotta ask him.
we did coke last night and i hate myself as usual. i dont have money. im not sure why i think i do. im not sure why i seem to think im lilo (or cartman for that matter) and why "i do what i want" so fucking much. im a bad, bad girl. but, it was a nice night. pretty foggy from some fire in sarasota i think. its cool. like fog but all day and night. very cool.
im dead tired. my mom says she heard us up at 4. i told her shes a liar. my reasoning? i dont think i only slept for 2 hours. but, we did have some md 20/20 to lull us to sleep and some sex. so, by the time all that was done-it couldve been 6 and id be none the wiser.
so many ramblings...so little time.
oh, i lost my rent check-i think it fell out of my purse before i mailed it...pretty sure i havent mailed it yet...and so far ive spent at least $20 from my moms half of the rent. im awesome.