8:46 p.m. - Friday, Jun. 15, 2007
i know its not going to last.
this isnt the one. again.
but, i dont know that i ever really thought it was. wishful thinking is my forte.
we live together. have now for 2 weeks. its ok. but i feel our relationship declining. going downhill. but i am trying! for this to work. what do i do if it doesnt?
i quit my job the day before i moved out of my moms. smart. right? no, not really. which i realize more each day i am the homemaker. housewife, if you will. it sucks. but im on my own. living with my boyfriend.
he said he loves me. swears, up and down, by it. i dont believe him. but i said it anyways. just to keep things running smoothly. i cant explain it. but, "it" isnt there. but i am content. content enough to live with the man i like and his dog. to wash dishes and watch tv all day. to sweep and make the bed and walk harley. it isnt that bad. but i cant wait til i get a job. then, i will have my own money-which, it isnt fair i take so much of his; and i wont be responsible for all of the dishes. but, today-i have no reason to complain about housework when i have no real work.
idk. this is okay. its different for sure. and this keyboard has no h key and my fingers hurt. so. wish me luck. and hopefully ill be back with a job.