7:19 a.m. - Tuesday, Aug. 18, 2009
and true love.
and kindred spirits.
and all that good-gooshy stuff.
do i believe it to be on craigslist?
to find it on cL?
im at such a point where...im desperate enough to look there.
not for love directly. like:
im looking for love. if you are too, reply to poster.
but, maybe one day we can tell our children the crazy story how we met by fucking around with craigslist and it was just kismet.
ive posted what i guess some would call a "personal". its not that personal. its in the strictly platonic section.
i need new friends. and the women for women are looking to fuck women. so, i go to the strictly platonic. i met ripley like that-though quite a short friendship...but it stayed platonic and innocent enough. which is what i want.
well, i want that kind of friendship first. and then it will blossom into love and then into an eternal relationship.
is that so much to ask?
well! what are my choices?! i am so sick of being alone. and im not meeting anyone new with the people i already know. and im not meeting anyone of substance downtown fort lauderdale. and no one else will give me the time of day. theres no one ive wanted to give me that time of day in forever.
and i can only pine for the same person for so fucking long. and its fruitless anyways. i know that. its just fun to think about what could be. i love michael-but im not ruining that one again. its taken a very long time and very hard work (at least on my part, maybe some moderate on his) over the last five years. i cannot rock this boat. no matter how much i want to when he gets home.
but i cant let his homecoming be my only motivating factor in life right now. which it almost is.
i need a hobby.