3:16 p.m. - Thursday, Feb. 02, 2012
crazy for you
just when i have everything figured out...i dont.
sometimes..like this time..thats a good thing.
hes alive. he doesnt hate me or want nothing to do with me. all good things.
due to unforeseen circumstances he just hasnt had a chance to get in touch with me and put my heart and head to rest.
just when id accepted that it was done..
now, though..im not sure what to do. keep it going? go through the last week again and again in the future? sudden extended absences that leave me doubting myself and replaying every syllable we spoke or wrote to each other wondering where i went wrong?
i dont know. i dont want that. i know that much. but i also know that i dont think id be okay with myself if i just let it go. to never hear his voice again. id be mad at myself and find myself regretting my past selfs actions in this situation..
so i wont yet. im strong. i can hold on.
