12:11 a.m. - Thursday, Apr. 04, 2013
love musings
lately when i think of you...my heart starts to flutter-probably literally it feels like. my stomach grows nervous. antsy. excited.
when i say im scared..i think its in a good way. if not the best.
im scared because its a shock. a shock to my system. a shock to my knowledge and understanding of the/my universe. a jolt to the heart...ive been heartdead for a long time and now all of a sudden..im so happy at moments i feel my heart may explode from love energy racing through it. i didnt see this coming, i swear. but once it hit me (like a ton of bricks) i could hardly wait 48 hours to tell you. i couldnt keep it in. i didnt know what to do with the information..that im in love with my best friend.
you make my heart feel full. you make me not feel so empty. make me smile walking down the street...im serious..not all the time, but its happened now..
i dont want to ruin this. thats only a small fear. but, i dont see it happening. weve "broken up" several times before and always found our way back to each other..whatever happens i just know well be fine.
part of me feels like this could even be the endgame..i dont know..much more time will have to truly tell that..but id be lying if i said there wasnt a tingly little feeling in my stomach, telling me something i might already know..
