12:06 a.m. - Friday, Nov. 20, 2015
I'm besides myself!
Ok...what's up with all these Capitals and shiz??? done..
sooo...tonight, with boredom leaning on me like patrick shadowing me at work (no concept of personal space)..i fb messaged justin.
justin. my always known soulmate. i know it. i knew it. but...
he didnt chose me. my feelings about the surety of our eternal partnership probably had so little to do with tonight. alcohol did. but...ill take it.
ill take it any way he wants to give it to me.
thats kiiinda the hurdle here. im balls in love with this man for 5 years. he paid me some funny drunk attention via facebook on a thursday night..but never before...
before, he led me on. i did things to purposely turn him on.
i sent him the only nude picture of me that ever existed (beside my toddler bathtime pics).
he is the only person i've ever sent pictures of my body to.
i really liked him.
not just that i liked him.
i knew from Day 1 that i was in Love.
i trust myself in that sense. my heart is smart and it knows its truth.
this man has always triggered baby-having feelings from my gut.
only one other has had this physical effect on my uterus.
and i know what i want. i want justin.